20.8.11

Once

My body found the ocean for the first time in too long
The brine I conjure in memory mists and splashes on my face while
The cacophony surrounds my body
As small fish flip and dart near me
The pink blue tones in the eastern sky make me commit to seeing the sunrise tomorrow

I tried to burn the poison within me swimming against and with the current
To make my muscles burn
To release some portion of my frustrations
Vanishing beads of sweat into the endless nature of the water that surrounds me

I toyed with history with every grain of sand and ounce of water I made contact with
Just trying to appreciate the real essence of connection

My ability to connect needs a tune up
Like a bike sitting still over a hard winter

We should have been using those sled discs together
But my body is my boogie board right now
That I am committed to toning like my heart
That needs repair

Or a replacement chain
To aide in the constant rotation of a scattered self

I play the fool when I mask as organizer
A jester to my own follies
I am a jack in the box with an escape door
Able to vanish at the pop of the top

It wasn't well thought out
When I first popped the secret hatch and removed myself prior to the end of the ditty
The crank was being turned slowly
And I had plenty of time to consider my options
But I was so enticed by this new discovery
This secret passage
I couldn't help but mask and escape

A dunce to the jester
I am in a corner
Displayed for all
And no amount of penance will relive this period
For even when the bell rings
I am still waiting for you
In the vast ocean of myself

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